When I was in High School I was very involved with the gay community: the GSA was my social life, I was in the Governors Commission for gay & lesbian youth, etc…but over the years of living on the streets & then raising children, I lost touch with the gay community.
At first it didn’t seem to matter much, since almost everyone on the streets seemed to be Bi–but, I didn’t seem able to attract women, while men circled me like sharks smelling blood in the water.
For a long time it seemed like the only girls who liked me invariably had a guy with them who would fidget miserably as she publicly kissed me.
Although I never stopped being attracted to women, I became convinced that women were too scary, too unavailable, something to be “appreciated” but not pursued.
And then she kissed me.
We were talking at a party, and she smiled, leaning unexpectedly in mid conversation to connect our lips. I looked around, expecting to see a pathetically jealous man hovering nearby–but no! Only her blue eyes sparkled at me. For once, a single woman liked me!
We went on a date in Central Square on Valentines Day–holding hands on the street like it was nothing! Dinner and then back to her place…
Walking with her small but curvaceous body pressed into my side, every woman and girl that I had ever had feelings for came back to me, and my heart overflowed.